The muffin man!!

well I did say he didn't bear much talking about but I came across this picture see....it reminds me so very much of him physically, the sword and WTF was I doing there?? and see that look....it says it all....really it does :)

I'll try desperately to be fair












again enter-------> the muffin man, frank zappa

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hcm7uJ74XFI&feature=related

still can't get enough of this song.....the guitar solo is indeed very exquisite.....I must stress that it is quite important to get the soundtrack to the blog in your head if u aren't actually listening to it...it adds to the drama *jazz hands*

I did wonder what muffin man (I did consider calling him the pharter man.....peeeeeeewwwwweeee) saw in me after four days split from limpet man...I was a fucking wreck....20 minutes late for coffee, skinny from my year of elimination diet, nervous, angry as fuck that limpet man was busily cutting off utilities in his name even though the bills were directly debited from my account so I would have to pay disconnection fees with an already deflated bank balance.....yeah well it doesn't really mean that much since none of us starved....I do have good support around....but it's the thought that counts :) enter-------> bullet with butterfly wings, smashing pumpkins

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ktff3bZpux8

anyway, I digress again...what the hell would he see in me?? He told me of how his heart rate was very slow at one stage during his training to be a world class swordsman, he had traversed the world 5 times, how he had passion for his job as a literacy teacher aid for naughty boys, how he was building and impossibly beautiful house by himself and he was a punk rock star playing bass in a band at one stage..... enter-----> muscle of love, alice cooper

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MjHHgq6ZyVk

why would an obvious legend of the world pay any interest to me?? I was washed up, stressed, burntout, newly unbedridden, broke, single mother of 3 with absolutely no hidden fantasies about any knight in shining armour coming to save me......did I mention world weary and cynical?? enter-------> zero, smashing pumpkins

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vPH9qid7hWU

watching him singing badly and playing off key and the wrong chords with a bass at an open mic night down the local pub brought me some discomfort whilst acquaintances looked and rolled their eyes at him to me.....but I clapped dutifully and smiled....and drank.....after all that was his bag not mine....I was glad when he got bored with it though...

he had pressed me to change my relationship status on facebook to in a relationship with.....(against my sensibilities I complied)

our first argument was a silly one....I simply grew tired of complying to lets follow the farting muffin man around to I might do something else today....I mentioned that I had enough "fun" that day said goodbye and walked away.....enter ------> walk on by, the stranglers

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4mzHbY_ikoE

HE WAS ABSOLUTELY FURIOUS!!!


again enter ------> you fucked up, ween

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=azuS2RCAQHE


and he changed his relationship status to single within a blink of an eye....I was in shock for a while I must admit...(even limpet man gave warning of intended malice) after all....who reaches legendary status of world traveller, fencing star and getting one's heart rate down to verrrrrrrry slow without showing a little patience here or there.....

I gave enough patience for him to get over it for the two of us......as that is what I do.....until I get bored with it....it was mentioned already that I was a martyr and that my special toxicity ability is to make excuses for people until I get over it....it took way too much time....as I was still not over the throes of guilt of yet another relationship gone bad with the last one.....

I tried to make him understand he was a bit silly but I made the mistake of being too nice because I was still wanting there to be a relationship even though every sensibility was screaming out to get the fuck away from angry farting muffin man....

I however remained valiant in my endevour to be patient enough to reveal to him how very silly our first argument was and be kind enough to nicely reveal him to himself as a twat and forgive....and even invited him for a camping trip on new years.....of course I paid for the entire trip, supplied his alcohol, took him to the toilet by car when it was only 400-500 metres up the road....I woke up to the most horrendous smell in the tent....was it fart?? was it smelly shoes?? it was a symphony of both....that was sensory overload enough....gasping for air I left the tent....for the rest of the day I was busily rethinking WTF was I doing there?? enter this song actually shits me but it adds to pathos....hehe-------> here I go again, whitesnake.....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LxDqj8lclWA


these are his gems which to me represent the appropriate nature of his job to be literacy aid for naughty boys....snippets of emails to me...short, sharp, succinct parries :D

"geez.... u Analise ur self into knots..."

"if u express ur self in stupid ways u get stupid responces"

"u r adept at being angry, aggressive and selfperfectionality"

here are the last couple of emails in this most romantic relationship when I had gotten bored with being nice.....

me.... "u twat...lol"

him....."fuck off and stop cuber stalking me"

me..."ur emailing me back...I think it's funny...hilarious actually"

him...."do u feel like limpet man?"

me..."oh yes....I got a love horn...guffaw"


I did mention quite a few times to him that I wasn't really into hero worship and that he me pegged all wrong but he didn't quite get it.....I wonder if he gets it now?? possibly not....

lessons from todays exercise....

sometimes being uncertain about someone and not jumping to conclusions can be beneficial for fairness....I don't think I was actually being fair by sticking around to let him know that he was a twat....that's for him to figure out....as I figure out for myself....a fellow yet somewhat less angry twat....

smell does matter....I didn't mention that he wore the same socks over and over and the same underwear too for more than 4 days at a time.....but I have now...YES IT MATTERS!!

self proclaimed legends are not all that...are simply that...self proclaimed....even the lowest of the low can have more affiliation to love and beyond than a "prestigious" person.

again I can see it was way too soon to start sharing anything with another human being like personal space o_O